With the craziness of the past few months and the Covid-19 pandemic, the fear of the unknown regarding sports, the discussion of whether or not we should even have sports, and the recent decision by KSHSAA to ban spectators from winter sports events, I've been mulling what to say.

It came to me the other day, and it was inspired by an email I received from one of my wrestlers: (edited because I am an English teacher and can't help myself)

"Coach, you stood by me and let me become a part of the wrestling team and be part of this family. Every year no matter how bad the world is, we have a place to come to as an escape from going down or continuing down the wrong path. You continue to fight for us no matter how bad we screw up, and you fight the fight not to keep us on that mat where we put our blood sweat and tears. Just know that when you coaches are fighting for us or even when you gotta be the one tearing us a new one. You don't tear us down and re-build us. You do much more than that. You take what was once there, no matter how bad the situation, and you help us cope and use our feelings in a healthy and safer way. You go out and take your time from your real family and you give up the chance to do whatever you want, but no -- you unconsciously become the father figure that some of us need because some of us were never lucky enough to know our fathers or to grow up with a man in the house. All of you coaches (and everyone else that you you brought in to help) have also been there for us all and for me. I want - no, I need - you to know that you guys are far from being just a coach. You are the men that chose to help others and give them a safe place to be and not just that but also gave them the family that a lot, if not most or all like me, needed. So what I need this year to keep me motivated is to help us stay on the mat as long as possible cause we can't let COVID-19 pin us to the ground."

I'd just asked my wrestlers to give me some tips on how to help motivate them. I just wanted to know a little bit of what they feel works best for them. And then I got that message.

With all the changes happening, one thing I fear more than anything else is the rift that's being driven between us all. Sports have the power to bring people together, and with the emphasis on social distancing, the consequences of virtual learning, and the discord brought on by all the disagreements with masks, etc., we're losing our connections to one another. Sports unite us despite the religious, ethnic, socio-economic, linguistic, etc. differences that would otherwise stand in the way.

I can think of very few other activities that can serve our kids' mental and physical health needs, and right now those things cannot be neglected. As a coach, I take on a nurturing role in these kids' lives. I don't replace the parent; I become a second set of eyes to help raise these youngsters to become outstanding citizens. While I coach a specific sport in the winter -- wrestling -- I'm also able to help instill a sense of being a servant-leader in the athletes in our program. The act of giving back is such a simple thing and can come in so many forms. A person who gives back to the community in one way or another is a great asset to us, and I use the wrestling program as a means to both teach our children and to serve the community.

One of the most incredible aspects of organized sports is how it gives the athlete the opportunity to learn how to overcome adversity in life. That's what I love about wrestling -- no matter the score, if there's still time on the clock, you can still win. We teach wrestlers in our program that it is our goal to end each period on top. Get the takedown before the end of the period. Reverse your opponent in the final seconds. Maintain your dominance on top as the clock runs down. Regardless of the match score, finish on top. Stay competitive. That becomes a habit, and it translates beyond the mat so well.

So many wrestlers tend to naturally judge their success by whether or not they win a certain match, qualify for the state tournament, win a state medal, make varsity, etc. I use my role as a wrestling coach to help them learn that measurable goals like "going undefeated" are so tricky to achieve, and once that sort of goal becomes an impossibility, there's always the need to re-evaluate and refocus your goals. "Being an undefeated state champion" is a great accomplishment, but if that goal becomes thwarted, it needs to be modified to "being a state champion." I use sports to help athletes learn that the pursuit of a goal is an ongoing process with an outcome that can (and may need to) change. There must be process goals set along the way, a plan to follow, and the need to reflect on progress and re-evaluate what's next.

The suggestion that continuing with winter sports is a selfish action really rubs me the wrong way. We are taking steps to protect the health of our athletes and to minimize the spread of the virus. We are utilizing research and collaborating to make sure we're doing things right. We are making sacrifices to enable us to continue doing what we love. Sports, to me, are an integral element of our children's education. I am a teacher first and foremost. Those of you who know me know that I put education as one of the most important aspects of life. While I took on the roles of English teacher (and then gifted teacher) and wrestling coach (as well as soccer coach), those are simply modifiers. I am a teacher and a coach. I view them as one and the same. Over the development of my professional life, I've come to apply coaching principles in the classroom and teaching principles on the mat.

I'm afraid of what would happen if we were to lose the opportunity to have sports. I'm afraid of what unforeseen consequences will arise. We are not isolated little family groups that can survive on our own. We are a community that comes together and helps raise one another's children. I used to throw out a line by John Donne when I taught "To Kill a Mockingbird":

"No man is an island, entire of itself; every man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main. If a clod be washed away by the sea, Europe is the less, as well as if a promontory were, as well as if a manor of thy friend's or of thine own were. Any man's death diminishes me, because I am involved in mankind; and therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls; it tolls for thee."

I will continue to advocate for my wrestlers and fight for our season. I will continue to make sacrifices because I know that I can make a difference. If it means parents must watch from home through live-streaming, so be it. If it means we have to wear masks in seemingly illogical situations, so be it. If it means we have to reconsider the very nature of how we do things as a program, so be it. I view my role as a teacher and coach as a vital role. I see it as an essential part of our society. It's not about me and my pride or ego; it's about doing what's right and serving others.

It's not about telling parents and students that they have to deal with the disappointment of not getting to play sports. It's not about instant gratification or self-interest.

I've always believed that wrestling is a metaphor for life. I'm praying for the health of my athletes and their families. As "Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another," I truly believe that we can continue to come together in these trying times. Thank you all, and God bless!

Week 3 of Winter Sports, Tuesday, December 8, 2020