"Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble." (Ecclesiastes 4:9-10)

Misery loves company, right? But what does that truly mean? One might say that it means that if we are unhappy, then we inherently want others to share in our negative state as well. Or, one might say that it means misery is easier to bear when one is not the only one miserable. Regardless, I want to focus less on the misery aspect and more on the company aspect.

When I was a senior in high school, I did my extra workouts during wrestling season one of two ways: by myself or with my best friend and practice partner Lance. The nature of the sport of wrestling demands extra workouts, and to keep our weight down, we had to dedicate extra time outside of normal practice. Most of the time, I preferred to workout alone, but Lance and I began to learn that we could help one another by coming together as we trained.

I tend to be a lone wolf by nature. I'm comfortable doing things alone. I would train, run, lift weights, etc. by myself without a second thought. I would get lost in my own thoughts as I focused on my goals and did what I thought I needed to do to attain them. Looking back, however, it was when I had company that things went much more smoothly. Having a teammate or buddy with you does, in fact, help you overcome the pain, misery, and anything else that might derail you from your objectives. It took me a while to realize this truth that had been staring me in the face.

I don't believe that God wants us to operate solo. Quite the opposite; I believe that God prefers us to be together. A few years ago, I noticed that the team shirts for my school's soccer team bore the letters I-S-I on the backs. I asked around and learned that it stood for "Iron Sharpens Iron." This got me thinking. I'd heard of wrestling programs that adopted this mantra from the book of Proverbs, and I'd always believed it was the mindset of self-improvement. Two sharp athletes clashing as they trained would make each other better, like iron sharpening iron. Long ago, metallurgists learned that through the use of abrasives, they could fashion metals into stronger tools and weapons. The application of this idea to athletics was a philosophy of training with the best to become your best. It was a "lone-wolf" interpretation to the phrase.

I joined the high school soccer coaching staff in the fall of 2020, and in the short time I've been a part of the program, I've learned quite well that ISI is more than an egocentric mindset for attaining one's goals. The idea of being a part of the team is the crux of this mindset, and I feel it is an essential message from Ecclesiastes. With a team (or a single teammate), we not only have the benefit of companionship, but we also grow with each other. Jesus never intended for us to be alone, especially in times of duress or in the various crucibles of life. Humanity—and life itself—is an interconnected realm. Even in Genesis, the Bible tells us, "It is not good that the man should be alone" (2:18). The Holy Trinity consists of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. Adam and Eve had one another. Christ had His Disciples.

As coaches and servant leaders, we must strive to instill a value for companionship within our athletes. Many of us speak of our programs being "families," and as families, we must overcome the natural inclinations to go solo, to put up blinders or shields to protect ourselves from others. We must embrace the idea that two people (or more) are better than one.

Moment of Kaizen:

• To what extent is your team involved in setting goals or making decisions for the program?
• How do you reinforce the idea that each of your team members has unique value and that the bonds between everyone must be nurtured and strengthened?
• Why might your athletes balk at the idea of “We before me,” and what can you do to correct their rejection of this mindset?

Related Passage: “As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend.” (Proverbs 27:17)

God has always intended His children to be a family and to live and grow in harmony with one another. Our respective sports are a microcosm of this idea, especially considering how diverse our athletes can be. Life is full of inequalities, and it is through the bonds of the team that we can prepare our athletes not only to strengthen one another in preparation for future obstacles, but also to instill a true feeling of “family” as the core foundation to our programs.

August 29, 2021

This article is a part of a series of Coaches Devotionals that I will be writing over the course of the next year. Please click here if you would like to receive email notifications when a new devotional is published.